Local nonprofit provides forum for gay teens Local nonprofit provides forum for gay teens (May 20, 2005)

By Kathy Schrenk

Yael Tygiel had to fib to her mom in order to go to her first Outlet support group meeting.

When the girl was in the eighth grade, she asked her mom if she could go to the meeting for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning youth. "Which one are you?" her mom asked. "Questioning," she replied. And mom said no.

The next year, Tygiel was in high school, and he asked her mom if she could go to a support group for "stressed-out" kids. Mom said yes that time. So Tygiel went to an Outlet meeting.

Things have changed a lot for Tygiel and her mom since that rocky beginning. Tygiel has become a leader in the Mountain View-based Outlet program -- which serves kids throughout the mid-Peninsula and South Bay -- and in other local organizations for youth like her, including the statewide Gay Straight Alliance Network Youth Council and the local GSA chapter at Gunn High School in Palo Alto.

And her mom, for her part, has come to accept Tygiel's orientation (she now considers herself bi) and is even proud of her activism.

She and fellow Outlet member Adrian Arredondo, a sophomore at Mountain View High School, both received Youth Leadership awards at Outlet's recent fund-raising dinner and auction.

Like Tygiel, Arredondo had trouble with his mother when he came out to her as a gay teen. "It was hard for her to accept, but it's getting better," he said. A practicing Catholic, his mom has little problem with his sexuality, but wishes he wasn't so "flamboyant," he said. He often wears eye make-up and nail polish, even borrowing them from his 8-year-old sister, he said.

Working on his school's Gay Straight Alliance group and leading Outlet programs for other teens, Arredondo hopes to help break down male-female stereotypes, he said. "You're forced to get into the boy box or the girl box," he said. "I would like to see gender roles kind of mesh together."

One of Tygiel's goals is to get kids to stop describing something they don't like as "gay." "When people say 'That homework is so gay,' I ask them to explain," she said. "Either you're really happy about that homework or it's attracted to other homeworks."

Mostly, the two young activists want to bring gay issues to the forefront in their communities, and hope to see Outlet expand, so that more teens can benefit from it like they did.

"Outlet has given me a place where I can be myself, not like at home or at school," Arredondo said.

Tygiel agrees. "You can talk about having crushes on other girls and no one freaks out," she said.

Outlet, which is run by the nonprofit Community Health Awareness Council in Mountain View, holds weekly support group meetings, as well as workshops and social gatherings. For more information, check out www.projectoutlet.org or call (650) 965-2020, ext. 22.

E-mail Kathy Schrenk at kschrenk@mv-voice.com

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