The Wife of a Traveling Salesman
Original post made by Jennifer Fogliani on Feb 12, 2012
After we got married and had kids, his traveling became far less romantic and much more inconvenient. My husband and I make a great team, and the weeks that he travels, it's like I'm playing in a championship game without the MVP.
A few weeks ago we had our third child, Emily. We just transitioned from a man-on-man defense to zone. So when my husband told me on Sunday that he had to travel for work, I almost passed out. The thought of a whole week playing 3 against me seemed like impossible odds.
"Not another trip!" My daughter, Josie, exclaimed when my husband told us at dinner that he'd be leaving the next day.
"Can I come?" My son, Owen, asked enthusiastically.
"You sure this isn't something you could handle over video conferencing?" I pleaded while I rocked a fussy Emily to sleep. But I already knew the answer.
Despite the fact that we live in the epicenter of technological advances, nothing has been able to replace the face-to-face meeting. Once or twice a month, my husband has to travel for work. He's always sad to leave us but happy that there's work to be done.
One of the unexpected perks about moving to Mountain View has been meeting so many other moms whose husbands also travel for work. We bond over shared experiences and help support each other the weeks that our husbands are gone.
You can spot a mom whose husband is traveling from a mile away. Her hair is disheveled. Her outfit mismatched. Her coffee cup filled to the brim. And even though she's overwhelmed in every possible way, she's smiling and calm because she knows that her kids are relying on her, and only her, to keep it all together.
Having a husband who travels does have its benefits. After I put the kids to bed, I can plop down in front of the TV with a bowl of cereal and watch as many reality TV shows as I want. TWhe kids can't go running to dad and create controversy when I say no. And the joy I get from watching my kids throw the door open and sprint across the lawn into their dad's arms after a long week apart makes the struggles of the week alone seem worthwhile.
Things were certainly different this week while my husband traveled and I took care of our 3 kids. Neither my husband nor I had the time to send sweet text messages or the energy for late night phone calls.
But even after 7 years and 3 kids it's good to know that absence can still make the heart grow fonder. This trip, more than ever before, I realized just how much my husband does to support me every day and how much I miss him when he's gone.
on Feb 13, 2012 at 7:09 am
Now try having your husband being away in a war zone for a year, coming back a changed man, and then going back two years later for another year.
You should seriously stop complaining.
on Feb 13, 2012 at 7:48 am
@ Army Wife
You are definitely right - what you and other army spouses have to deal with is much harder than what I went through last week. For me, at the time, it seems overwhelming and that's what I was sharing. Thanks for adding your perspective.
on Feb 14, 2012 at 5:07 pm
I also have a husband who travels for work. Is there any kind of Mom's Group for families with traveling dads?