By Chandrama Anderson
E-mail Chandrama Anderson
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ... (More)
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in Silicon Valley for 15 years before becoming a therapist. My background in high-tech is helpful in understanding local couples' dynamics and the pressures of living here. I am a wife, mom, sister, friend, author, and lifelong advocate for causes I believe in (such as marriage equality). My parents are both deceased. My son graduated culinary school and is heading toward a degree in Sociology. I enjoy reading, hiking, water fitness, movies, 49ers and Stanford football, Giants baseball, and riding a tandem bike with my husband. I love the beach and mountains; nature is my place of restoration. In my work with couples, and in this blog, I combine knowledge from many fields to bring you my best ideas, tips, tools and skills, plus book and movie reviews, and musings to help you be your genuine self, find your own voice, and have a happy and healthy relationship. Don't be surprised to hear about brain research and business skills, self-soothing techniques from all walks of life, suggestions and experiments, and anything that lights my passion for couples. (Author and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Calif. Lic # MFC 45204.) (Hide)
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I’m a Jew in Germany
Uploaded: Feb 11, 2023
I’m just back from a walk to the Pilgrimage Church of the Assumption of the Virgin Mary on Bogenberg Hill. I quietly and respectfully entered the Church. I found these words bubbling up inside me: Jesus, please help our World. We’re in trouble. Please help people truly understand and enact your intentions for love, tolerance and care for those in need.
My apologies, Readers, for not writing as often recently. As I mentioned previously, my husband is having surgery in Bogen, Germany (four disc replacements in his neck). On January 18th we were offered February 15th as the surgery date, and expected at the hospital here on the 9th. We had five days to accept, and four days after that to pay in full! As you can imagine it’s been a whirlwind of preparation to travel internationally, with the added excitement [stress of pre-surgery testing/imagery.
Bogen is 140km from Dachau Concentration Camp.
Dachau reminds me in a huge way that I am Jewish. I am a Jew ethnically, but not religiously or even culturally. I don’t think about the fact that I am Jewish very much; it’s just an underlying fact. I am reminded of it when I hear about antisemitism (even locally with antisemitic graffiti at Stanford University). I often think about being a woman in a culture that doesn’t value (or pay) women on par with men. And I’m speaking from a first-world view. Our culture objectifies women, and works hard to make us think we’re supposed to be in skinny, unhealthy bodies to please men. It's a persistent and successful campaign: most women hate their bodies.
I lived in Austria for a year when I was 20 years old. I came initially as part of the University of Redlands Junior year travel abroad program. Our cohort visited a concentration camp as part of our education. It was the first time it really hit me—I knew in my bones and cells: I’m Jewish! My people were tortured, worked to death, and gassed to death, right here. My family that left Europe prior to World War II survived, and those that didn’t leave all perished.
What will you do today for love, tolerance, and care for those in need?
What is it worth to you?
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