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On a recent warm fall afternoon, I notice a man riding his bike with a huge mixed bouquet of flowers in his basket. I watch as he turns north from Willow onto Middlefield, curious about who they are for (or had someone given them to him)? I wonder how often he brings flowers home, and how they are received? Is this an occasion? Are friends coming for dinner? Was it an impulse buy?

I remember the story my husband once told me of buying flowers at the grocery store. When he got to the check stand, the cashier asked him, “What did you do?” The implication was that he had done something wrong, and that was why he was buying flowers ? as atonement for a blunder of some sort.

Whenever I tell this story, people want to know, was the cashier a man? No, it was a woman.

Who buys flowers in your couple? When, and how come?

About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple,...