By Chandrama Anderson
Premarital and Couples: Are We the Only Couple Having Problems?Uploaded: Jan 31, 2020
No, you are not. Despite how other couples look to you, you are definitely not the only one having problems.
In the same way that you don't want anyone to know your relationship is in trouble, other couples are doing the same.
A few years ago I helped present a two-Saturday couples workshop with Kathryn Ford. One of the most striking things about it was the couples' amazement (and the comfort in finding out): We are not the only ones! All couples have difficulties and struggles at times.
So the question isn't who is having issues -- the question is what to do about it? I implore you, do not wait six years (the average time couples wait before seeking help). By then you will be almost "out of rope" and learning new skills and tools when you're at your wits' end is so much harder.
Are you looking at your partner with rosy-colored glasses? Clear glasses? Or have you reached the stage where every action and conversation is tinted by compost-colored glasses; eroding trust, bit-by-bit, day-by-day, and night-by-night?
Perhaps a better question is: Are We the Couple Taking Care of Our Relationship?