Whole Foods burst into the Los Altos-Mountain View borderland on Sept. 13, with grocery features rarely seen around these parts.
The flattering lights and zigzag traffic patterns feel like Vegas, baby. You and the apples look marvelous, but good luck shopping without spending way more time and money than you’d planned.
This Whole Foods has ample parking, most of it underground. To soften the blow of separating us from the sight of our cars, Whole Foods offers drive-up service. The checker gives you a number to match the plastic bin your groceries go in, and you swing by the handy pickup station. Lug no more.
The scope and beauty of takeout and made-to-order foods make most other markets look like Piggly Wigglies.
One night at the new Whole Foods, a teenager’s first words were, “I’ve never seen so much food in my life!” Few supermarkets have the ability to astonish a teenager.
Still, three tours of Whole Foods’ swank Prepared Foods section yielded surprisingly little to love.
At lunch, my companion ordered a barbecued beef satay ($7.95) while I went to the sandwich area, picked out a smoked turkey panini ($6.99) and took up the counterperson on her offer to grill it. By the time his satay was ready, my panini had gone cold.
A quicker route would have been through the retro cafeteria line of steam-table all-stars like turkey Tetrazzini and tamale pie. Pizza slices also stand ready, but they have a tired look, born out by a flat taste.
The hot food station offers good beef brisket ($12.99 a pound, weighed before the gravy gets there) and the hefty Whole Meal Deal ($9.99 for meat and two side dishes, but they have to be vegetables). Macaroni and cheese ($6.99 a pound), and chicken from the tandoor oven also are good options.
In the refrigerated section of Prepared Foods, autumn toasted couscous ($5.99 a pound) is Thanksgiving for vegetarians. Butternut squash, dried curries and cranberries integrate the chewy couscous balls. A tangy dressing with sherry vinegar and fennel brings it together.
Parsnip pancakes ($5.99 a pound) are crisp, and a small amount of seared tuna with ginger ($16.99 a pound) is all you need.
Takeout containers list ingredients to anticipate all allergies, down to the sea salt and black pepper. They also come with an owner’s manual: “Our clear containers are NOT microwave safe. Our black containers ARE microwave safe. Our soup containers ARE microwave safe.”
In the sushi section, the Tsunami Combo ($9.40) is fresh and filling.
The salad bar ($7.49 a pound) has something for everyone, from fresh fruit to falafel. And unlike the rest of the store, it is very well organized.
A man on a cellphone: “I’m in the food court area. Where are you?”
That person may have been looking for organic chicken soup, which turned out to be next to the frozen dog food.
A display marked “Buy Local” featured fennel and cippolini onions from Hollister, next to asparagus from Peru and chestnuts from Italy.
However, hot soup is easy to find in the seafood section, the meat department, and in Prepared Foods. We tried carrot-ginger, clam chowder and black bean. Each was either bland or salty.
A few final hazards to avoid at the new Whole Foods: flabby seafood salads including ceviche ($10.99 a pound); creme brulee ($4.49); knife-resistant shallot-dressed Brussels sprouts. In eggplant Parmesan ($6.99 a pound), slabs of eggplant were thick and bitter.
While enjoying the sights, try to keep in mind that just as everything isn’t cheap at Costco, everything isn’t healthy at Whole Foods.
Whole Foods
4800 El Camino Real, Los Altos
(650) 559-0300
www.wholefoodsmarket.com
Hours: 8 a.m.-10 p.m. daily
Credit cards: yes
Wheelchair access: yes
Outdoor dining: yes
Parking: street level and underground lots
Bathroom cleanliness: good
Noise level: supermarket
